Laughter Land

Q: Why did the blind blonde cross the road?

A: She was following her seeing-eye chicken.

– It is always possible to park directly in front of any building you are visiting.

– A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty. (more…)

A funny pit stop scene from the movie Pixar Cars with Lightning McQueen - the young, quick race car.

Chuck Norris’s tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.

Chuck Norris sent a picture of himself in the crouched position to the IRS. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes…EVER
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– All men are idiots, and I married their king.
– I brake for no apparent reason.
– Time is what keeps everything from happening all at once.
– Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
– I didn’t fight my way to the top of the food chain to be a vegetarian.
– Women who seek to be equal to men lack ambition.
– Reality is a crutch for people who can’t handle drugs.
– I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.
– Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off NOW.
– Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
– Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else.
– Puritanism: the haunting fear that someone somewhere may be happy.
– Consciousness cuts into my napping.
– Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
– There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count and those who can’t.
– Keep honking. I’m reloading.

There are many strategies to help you win the lottery out there. For some funny tips like: “Get a pet chicken” or “Become a laborer” go here: win the lottery