Cross the Road… Blind Blonde
Q: Why did the blind blonde cross the road?
A: She was following her seeing-eye chicken.
Traveling on Friday
Q: If a cowboy rides into town on Friday, and three days later, he leaves on Friday, how does he do it?
A: The horse’s name is Friday.
Beat the Casino
Q: What is the only way to keep your money from the casinos in Las Vegas?
A: When you get off the plane, walk into the propellers.
What We Learn From the Movies
– It is always possible to park directly in front of any building you are visiting.
– A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty. (more…)
Pissing Contest into a Bar
Two men walk into a bar, one wearing a cowboy hat and the other wearing a Yankees cap. The guy in the Yankees cap approaches the bartender and make a bet: “I’ll bet you $1,000 that I can put a shot glass at one end of your bar and piss into it from the other end of the bar without spilling a drop.”
The bartender laughs and says, (more…)
Children’s Books That Didn’t Make It
– Accidents Happen: The Story of YOU
– The Little Sissy Wimp Who Snitched
– Some Kittens Can Fly
– You Can Paint Anywhere!
– Where Would You Like to Be Buried?
– Bad Katy and the Mom Who Stopped Loving Her
– The Attention Deficit
funny Pixar Cars scene
A funny pit stop scene from the movie Pixar Cars with Lightning McQueen - the young, quick race car.
Meeting the Parents
A girl invites her boyfriend over for dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl tells him that after dinner she wants to have sex with him for the first time.
The boy is ecstatic, but nervous because he’s a virgin. He goes to the pharmacy to get some condoms. He tells the pharmacist his situation and asks for advice. The pharmacist tells him everything there is to know about sex. At the register, the pharmacist asks how (more…)
Chuck Norris facts
Chuck Norris’s tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
Chuck Norris sent a picture of himself in the crouched position to the IRS. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes…EVER
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Is laughter the key to me being happy?
My friend and I were getting deep into conversation about my life. I had some issues growing up and still have some now...with low self-esteem issues and...Survey: If you died from laughter would you go to Heaven or Hell?
...Do you fill up a room with laughter when you enter?
Is it the maniacal kind like, "Muhahahahahahahahahahahahaha?" Then people start getting all nervous and start to move to the side of the room?...LAUGH MACHINE OR REAL LAUGHTER?
I mean, when watching shows like "Everybody Loves Raymond" and other sitcoms, the laughter you hear when something funny happens...is it real...Have you ever felt so tired and stressed that you just bursted into laughter?
...--->Can you die of laughter?<---?
...Where can one find The Land of Laughter and Gaiety, once having left the Happy Valley of Childhood way behind?
Thanks for the guidelines :))Have a Great Time!...